Sunday, November 15, 2009

Ok God, I get it!

This past week has been a great week with both my cancer and faith. I believe I'm being healed in both. It's now been a week since my chemo and I already feel better than I did before the chemo began. The week before chemo I struggled to eat and it would take me an hour to eat a bowl of soup. I was nausea and had constant pain in my stomach and back. Now after chemo, my stomach still hurts, but my back does not hurt. I can now eat different foods more quickly with a lot less pain.

God spoke to me in many different ways this week. In July my mother had a had a stroke and as a result my siblings and I take 24 hours shifts taking care of her. Each day I wake up and join whichever sibling is on shift at my mom's house while my wife's at work. I was raised in a strong Catholic family and once a week a priest comes to visit my mother to give communion and pray. If I'm there I always participate. On Monday two church ladies arrived to give communion and pray with us. Then, on Wednesday a Priest and a deacon came by to do the same. On Thursday I had lunch with my friend who has been studying religion for 30 years. We had a great talk and prayed together. When I got back to my mom's house that evening a Monsignor showed up, prayed and gave us communion again. Each time I took communion I prayed that everything it touched would be healed. On Saturday I went to church for the first time in a long time. Before the service began I was thinking about funerals, death and other terrible things that I shouldn't let in my mind. The priest started his sermon and guess what it was about....DEATH. I was shocked and almost fell out of my chair. Some of his points were that God has a plan. He knows your birthday and when you are going to die. Everything else is just biding time on earth. We should be living for Him and praising God until we join Him in heaven. As humans, sometimes we don't understand why people get diseases or even die young. Sometimes it's not about the people suffering, it's about bringing those around them closer to God. At this point, I really about fell out of my chair. God was speaking directly to me. I looked up and thought, "Ok God, I'm hard headed and not very bright. You brought to me 2 church ladies, a deacon, a religious friend, a monsignor, and I was still doubting you. Then a priest delivered a message just to me. Ok God, I get it!" At that very moment I felt the Holy Spirit entering my body. I knew that chemo wasn't healing me, but it was the Lord himself.

"Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you." Psalms 9:10


  1. Mark, I read this in a daily devotional sometime between being diagnosed and surgery. I found a lot of comfort in it, and hope you will too. Barry

    "When we find ourselves in situations we can't comprehend and wonder why, we can find peace and comfort in the knowledge that He will never leave us. Our human understanding may not grasp the reasons for unpleasant circumstances, but God comforts us, telling us that He has chosen us to be His children. We are His special ones, chosen to be with Him for eternity."

    Jeremiah 1:5 says "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you."

  2. From a daily devotional book I have:

    Becaue of the Lord's sustaining grace, we have access to His power, wisdom, and guidance.. When we ask, God's Spirit will provide the strength to perservere and help us fight doubt.