Thursday, June 3, 2010

Last Post

I've really enjoyed meeting some of you over the past few days and have also enjoyed hearing stories about my dad. I have never known much about his life outside of our house, so it's been nice seeing what an impact he made in so many lives. I can tell he was a good friend. I know many of you had to work on Tuesday and weren't able to attend the funeral but just know it was beautiful. There was a great turnout and everything went perfectly. He would have really enjoyed watching the firetrucks/motorcycles and have been honored to have so many people attend.

When my dad was diagnosed with cancer we decided to start this blog to update you guys. He was so excited about it and knew he'd be in remission soon. Well, we all thought he'd be in remission because he was doing so well. That was his personality though. He would get so determined about things that you couldn't doubt him. He said he'd be in remission and we believed him.

He could barely login to check his email, so we decided it would be best if I kept the blog up. Every night we'd call one another and plan out the entry. He'd have a thought or subject matter he'd want to discuss and he'd explain it to me. Many entries took over an hour of us going back and forth. He was so proud of this blog and I'm so happy I got to do it with him. He always said when he went into remission he'd get the blog printed into a book and help other cancer patients cope. I really can't express how much this blog meant to him and as a result hugely impacted me. This blog forced him to express himself in ways he'd never done with me before. I got to hear his thoughts for the first time. I will truly always treasure the time we had together creating each entry.

Overall, I wanted to thank you for all of the prayers and for keeping up with him. Each email or comment you left really made his day better. The prayers truly worked. When he was first diagnosed he wasn't given much hope. Instead, he lived several good months and was able to come to Christ. That alone is the hugest blessing of all. We now know for a fact that my dad went to Heaven!!! I can't express to you what a relief that is for me. Even at the end of my dad's life you could feel God's presence. I know it's hard to look at death as a blessing, even for me, he was my dad, but he was in so much pain. His last couple of weeks were terrible. Instead of struggling for days on end God took my dad quickly and painlessly. We will never know why my dad was chosen at such a young age to leave us, but I do know my dad impacted a lot of people. Maybe my dad fulfilled his duty on Earth earlier than most of us? He was always an overachiever.

I'm definitely not going to delete his blog, so if you ever miss him feel free to come back and read some of his thoughts. He really was special and I'm having a hard time figuring out where to go from here. What I do know is he was strong and certainly a fighter, so I plan on being the same way. I can almost hear him lecturing me right now. I can also take comfort in the fact that he is in Heaven. I feel so thankful that he dedicated his life to Christ in his final months.

*My dad was adamant that he'd end each post with scripture. Although I have no idea what he'd choose in this situation, I thought I'd leave you with my favorite verse.

"And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Romans 5:1-5


  1. Tiffany! Thank you for being such an awesome daughter. The time you spent creating the blog with your dad will be memories that you will be able to treasure and share with many. He touched so many lives through his writing. And yes, we don't understand but we do know that God has a plan. And we can rejoice that your dad did not have to suffer any longer. God wrapped his arms around him and took him home! What a reunion it was that day for him to be greeted by those that loved him and left this earth before him. Now, you,Justin and your mom will take his strength and use it to carry you through. When the days are hard, just remember all the great mements that ya'll shared! Where there is darkness, there is LIGHT! WE love you all!

  2. Tiffany, I think about you and your family daily since hearing about your dad's diagnosis and things taking a turn for the worse. I am so happy that you had the opportunity to grow closer to your dad these past few months. It makes my heart happy to know what you must have gotten out of the time you guys spent writing this blog and having him share his most intimate thoughts with you. I can only imagine how he felt as the two of you grew closer and closer throughout it all. I wish there was something I could say or do to make this time of grieving easier on you all. Know that so many people are still praying for you guys and if you ever need anything - even if just an ear to listen - please don't hesitate to to call, email, whatever you need... Talk to you soon! Love, Christina

  3. Tiffany,
    I firmly believe that god does things for a reason. God knew that your dad was going to put up the fight of his life no matter how hard it was going to be. Mark did just that by insisting on proceding to restart treatment even though it may not have been the thing to do at that time. Mark thought that all the delays were setting him back on his plan. I think God knew that over the next few days and weeks things would be pure hell and Mark was too good of a man to have to suffer. So God did take your dad quickly and painlessly on your dads own terms. Fight to the Bitter END. As a nurse, I have come to realize that sometimes Death is a blessing although it hurts us like hell we know that it will bring peace to the suffering. Just always refer back to how would your dad handle things that arent easy. He will be looking over you and will continue to guide you in your life. Thanks for posting for Mark when he could not. I think you two had an opportunity to share your heart, soul and mind thru this blog that you may not been able to do in any other way. Your a stronger woman than you know..MELISSA R

  4. Tiffany, your blog entry is so beautifully written. love you and praying for your family.